Waiting...

So now Lindsey and I are on the cruise waitlist. It is a chance at least, thank goodness. I got the tweet at just before midnight and within 5 minutes we were on the list. Our number...#2498. Good luck.

Josh and I took a weekend trip, minus the boys, to Houston. Josh had set everything up as a mystery date, which was really cool. We did all my favorite things while we were there. Lunch at Macaroni Grill, shopping at the Galleria, trying out new phones at T-Mobile, dinner, drinks, and fun at Dave and Busters, and in the morning after breakfast, we both sat in the hotel room and read the paper...in complete lazy silence. It was awesome!! Two thumbs up to the hubs for planning this short getaway for us. We were not even gone for 24 hours but it seemed like much longer!

Back to reality. Back to preparing for my last day of work, the kids' first day of school, meetings and soccer practices. The good thing is, I feel rejuvenated!

PS. Even though we do not have a confirmation on the cruise, and we are on the waitlist, Rose Tours could call us this week, next month, or two days before the cruise and I want to be ready. So I am going to be saving money and exercising to be prepared, just in case. And if we don't get on the boat...I will have a chunk of money and will be thin...so that is a bonus. Oh, and I need a passport. I'll wait for that until January I guess.

As Lindsey would say, "$hit on that noise."

My college roommate and fellow NKOTB junkie and I finally committed to spending the ridiculous amount of money to get our butts on this cruise next May. Presale tickets for past cruisers went on sale two days ago and it was a nightmare. The site kept crashing, they suspended sales for a while, and all in all, it was madness and chaos. General sale was today beginning at 11 am. You would think that the travel agency would have learned from the presale, but no. That is not the case.

Like many other die hard NKOTB fans, just looking for the opportunity to sail away and "Get wet in 2010", Lindsey and I stayed on our computers for 9 and a half hours total trying to get on. Lindsey during the day and me in the evening. I completely understand that cruises sell out. We knew that it would be very difficult to get tickets. But what happened today is shameful for all that were involved.

For 9 hours straight, we received message after message: "Oops, this link appears to be broken." and "Server is busy, try again later." and my favorite: "this page doesn't exist". Well actually it does exist. There were countless times that Lindsey was able to get our names in and pick a cabin, only to be booted off the system. 5 easy steps, that's all it takes to book this trip. Step by Step, right?

Wrong. Lindsey got to step 4 (I could give you more...) inputting our credit card information and click to confirm. We were in! Nope, wrong again...all you need is to click to confirm. Actually what happens when you click to confirm is that you are booted off the system again to one of the aforementioned messages. What is worse is that there were tons of women that never showed confirmation numbers or reservations and yet their credit cards were charged! Ludicris!

Obviously, this is not the work of NKOTB. But seriously...there are thousands upon thousands of die hard, crazy, fanatical women out there that would give one of their children away to get on this cruise. There has got to be a better system. Did you not know that NKOTB has a following like the freakin Beatles? Did you not know that we will sleep outside a venue to get tickets? How can you not be prepared for this?

And what really kills me is the thought of the tiniest possibility of a cruise is 2011. So peep this hypothethical...you make it onto the cruise in 2009. You are a past cruiser, so you get first dibs on 2010 and dammit, what do you know? You got tickets again. And hey, you wanna go again in 2011, and you get first dibs again and now you have seen them 3 times. What the hell? There are people that have tried to get on this cruise twice now, who have never met NKOTB, and they can't get a ticket to save their life. I don't think this is the reason why it sold out...but it sure doesn't help others. Equal opportunity to receive the Full Service from Jordan is all I ask.

Everyone related to NKOTB is always a-Twitter....but tonight, not a Tweet heard, not even a Peep.

Peep-peep Donnie. I wanted to give you Twugs, but it was not in the cards for this die hard fan. 9 hours of diligence yielded no positive results. Not even because (to quote the great Dane Cook) I did my best. Something is wrong...that system was flawed. Thank God "Something's Gotta Give" was on TBS after the cruise sold out, otherwise I was headed to drown my sorrow in a huge tub of ice cream and Twix bars!

Imagination.....

So the New Kids on the Block are doing another cruise next year...and what a coincidence...the week of my 30th birthday. For some strange reason, that seems like fate to me. Thirty is a birthday that I have not readily welcomed. It is a symbol of true adulthood, although I have been an adult for more years that I care to recognize. Actually, 30 is the only age I am scared of, not 31, not 40, not 50...just 30. Is it a time of reflection? A time to reevaluate life to decide where I am going?

Although I am currently 29, I feel much older. When others are out enjoying their 20's in graduate school, backpacking through Europe, tubing down the river with a beer in hand, seeking out true joy and purpose, I was home struggling with an Autistic child, another toddler, and a mostly absent husband. Don't get me wrong, the whole decade has not been a torturous. It has just been a struggle. Getting married and having children young is not an easy thing to do. That said, do I want to look back with regret? No. I have no regrets. The experiences form me into the person I am today...a continual work-in-progress. I love my family, unconditionally. Don't offer me money for them, because I won't take it.

Since Caleb started school last year, I have begun to remember Amber. I am Caleb's mom. I am Jansen's mom. I am Josh's wife. I love each title, but in the mix of thinking of that 21 year old newlywed, that 22 year old new mom, I lost me. Flashes of my previous life are very quick memories, and many of them I desire to have back. So maybe that is what my 30's are for. I want to come into my own. I want the balance between living for my family and living for me.

So in an effort to gain control over myself....I present....Reinventing Amber! I am transforming into the person I have in my mind. Quitting my job, being available for my children and their schools, getting into shape, getting finances in order, and creating goals for myself.

Did I mention how desperately I want to go on this NKOTB Cruise???? Talk about a break in the monotony of life! Chances are slim I can get a ticket since presale tickets go on sale for past cruisers two days before public sale! Does that seem fair...heck no! But if I am able to get a ticket, I will be posting about my efforts to raise money and lower my body weight. Accountability will be my new middle name. 30th Birthday = NKOTB Cruise. I am speaking it into existance...Mock me if you wish...I have no shame! :)

New Kids on the Block Love Fest

Gasoline to and from The Woodlands: $32

Dinner at the Cheesecake Factory with my mom, college roommate and her mother and grandmother, and some of my roommate's friends: $40.

An amazing Girls' Night Out complete with friends, family, and 5 hot members of a band (did I mention they were hot??): Priceless!

That's all folks!

This week I courageously, and with a great deal of thought and faith, gave my 30 days notice at work. Liberating, you might think? Not really. Or actually, not yet. I am concerned about the last 4 weeks spent tieing up loose ends, assigning new therapists to my current caseloads, and the ever popular financial question.

No, I will not be looking for another job. Yes, I will be staying home. What drags me into the suburban woman's dream? You guessed it. Family. I have big plans. Please note that I said, "plans". We shall see how those well-laid plans pan out.

On a side note, I took my mom to see NKOTB for the second time in less than a year. My love is renewed, the fire rekindled, the light burns bright. They have moved from a teeny-bop, sugary sweet, dreamy group of teenagers into broad shouldered, scruffy, sexy, fathers who happen to be amazing singers and performers. Their music has morphed from "Popsicle" to "Sexify my love" and "Full Service". Yes Jordan, you may give me the Full Service. I will willingly leave the bills, soccer games, therapies, school work, spaghetti dinners, and Transformers to accept your Full Service. And no, I will not be nervous.

End of the year for the boys

Caleb and Jansen have both finished their 2008-2009 school year and I am proud to announce my new Preschool 4 and 1st Grader!!! I am so proud of them both. May had to have been the most busy month yet, even busier than March due to the end of school festivities for each child, my work schedule, weddings, babies etc. Caleb received the Bookworm Award at school and was very excited to participate in his Kindergarten program. Jansen completed Preschool 3 and loved the Red, White, and Blue Parade and Picnic that his school hosted for them. Honestly, time is going so fast and I cannot believe that my youngest child is going into Kindergarten next year! AGH!!! At the end of it all, Jansen turned 4 and had an awesome American Idol party and he now shares his birthday with my best friend, Kara's, new son Andrew Keaton Davis. We are in for a busy summer!!!!!

Updates from insanity

Well, things have been really rough around here lately, thus I have not been blogging much lately. It seemed like things were going really well for Caleb until after his birthday when all things went down hill. He started having accidents at school and at home, he was up all hours of the night, as was I, he was having hour long tantrums. And finally we found out that it was all due to a fire alarm that went off at school and scared the peewilly out of him. Six weeks later, and Caleb was still not sleeping at night. One night he got up and got a butter knife and scratched up his bunk bed, my dining table, and his tv, all because he was trying to cut down his smoke detector. He and Josh went through the house disconnecting the green light on all the smoke alarms and voila! Caleb is back to sleeping all night long. Because Caleb has Autism and his language skills are still developing, we had no idea what the problem was and he couldn't tell us.

Which leads to the next development. Caleb's psychiatrist has been leaning toward diagnosing Caleb with Asperger Syndrome, but was always hesitant until the school could complete testing. So we started the testing process in October, and in April we had an ARD meeting for the school to tell us they are diagnosing him with Autism. So now that the words were spoken, and we have written confirmation of this, we are working to deal with it. There are so many uncertainties associated with this. Caleb has some fantastic strengths, and he also has some overwhelming obstacles. We work with him every day and learn something new about him and how he learns daily.

Anyway, that was a brief update on what has been going on in our lives. Hopefully I will be able to blog a little more in the coming weeks!